Passing by the neon sign reading “Guns” displayed in a Main Street store, a shudder of fear ran through me. “No, I’m safe,” I thought. I thought that in part because a gun store doesn’t automatically equal danger. But mainly I realized it because I became starkly aware of my family’s privilege while traveling.
Traveling with little kids is always A Thing. There’s car sickness, whines of “I’m bored!” and the world’s longest bathroom breaks. On our recent three-hour drive, we stopped no fewer than six times. When traveling, there’s always worries about kids wandering off or touching something dangerous, like a campfire.
But one thing that I never have to worry about is our family being discriminated against.
That’s because we’re a middle-class white family with a mom and dad who match gender expectations. There’s nothing about us that would set off prejudices about race, sexual orientation, or much of anything else. In fact, the only sign of our political orientation is our stereotypical car – a Prius.
But I know many of my friends and neighbors aren’t as lucky.
While sundown towns – where black people are not allowed after sunset – are no longer legal, there’s still plenty of racist folks threatening violence. A town in Pennsylvania recently profiled in the Washington Post has out-and-out Nazis living there. Many of their neighbors consider them “harmless” and “not bothering anyone.” If I was a person of color or a Jewish person who saw swastikas hanging outside someone’s door, I would disagree. Even in diverse Brooklyn, someone recently called the police on a person of color for standing in a doorway to get out of the rain. Prejudices aren’t limited to rural areas.
Unfortunately, outdoors activities can be particularly unfriendly to families of color. The isolation increases the risk. In fact, a black mom in a Facebook group I’m in posted asking if a local camping event would be safe for her to bring her son on. The fact that I’ve never had to consider that question reveals so much.
Similarly, many places are still hostile to LGBT families. Store and restaurant owners can still refuse to serve same-sex families. Bathroom bills keep trans kids and adults from either using the right bathroom or using it at all. Family vacations get a hell of a lot more complex and difficult when you have to factor in those issues.
Reflecting on our recent trip, I’m so grateful that we only have to deal with the normal nonsense from traveling with kids. I hope that we can work together so that in the future, no family has to deal with these issues either.
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