No, it’s not a gate fence!” I giggled. As we drove to one of our favorite yearly events, the Maryland Renaissance Faire, we passed the time playing Twenty Questions. It had taken a turn towards the silly, with my then four-year-old guessing the animal I was thinking of was a fence. Even though we were stuck in traffic, we were all laughing hysterically. While the Faire itself was great fun, that half-hour playing 20 Questions is what I remember the most.
Embracing How to Be Present with My Kids
Peering through a plexiglass wall, I held my two-year-old steady as he stood on a narrow ledge.
Ten minutes earlier, we had been on the other side of that plexiglass wall, on the ice of our town’s outdoors skating rink. Unsteady on my own skates, I held his left hand while his right hand gripped the wall. His feet flailed beneath him, slipping backwards, then forwards.
What Helps Me Keep My Kids’ Anti-Authoritarian Attitudes in Perspective
“I was such a rule follower! What happened?” I said to my husband after my kids once again ignored my directions and ran away laughing.
While they follow directions pretty well in school, I know I’m not the only one their anti-authoritarian streak comes out around. My mom has given them The Look she perfected after decades of teaching. They shrug it off. If you start counting without a very specific consequence attached to it, they just look at you, wondering what the point of this counting is. Authority for authority’s sake does not resonate for my children.
What My Kid Puking Taught Me About Living in the Moment
My five-year-old son ran into the living room, his hands over his mouth. The first words out of my mouth were, “Why are you up again?” It was the third time he had gotten out of bed that night. The next words out of my mouth were, “Are you okay?”
He looked confused, then ambled back to his room. Then, we heard retching.
When My Husband Was a Hero to My Kids
This balloon represents an act of everyday heroism.
The balloon had been in my older son’s room since his birthday in June. Lately, it’s been losing some serious air and drifting from room to room like a festive ghost. Somehow, it floated all the way to the basement stairs. So when someone left the door open (okay, neither I nor my son closed it), it drifted right out into the wintry mix.
What My Son’s Kindergarten Teacher Said to Me That Made a Huge Difference
“Just keep doing what you’re doing,” my older son’s kindergarten teacher told us, leaning slightly forward over the conference room table.
“Thank you,” I said, smiling harder than I expected to at a parent-teacher conference. She had just finished telling us what a delight our son was to have in class, as he worked hard, focused on getting things done, and was kind to his classmates. This is in contrast to some of his behavior at home. Lately, he has been not listening, fighting every effort to get ready for bedtime, antongizing his brother, and having a marked lack of self-control.
As I exhaled, it felt like I had been holding my breath for days.
Continue reading
Why Rock-Climbing With My Son Helped Me Let Go
“You got it, you got it!” I yell to my five-year-old as he reaches for a hold on a rock-climbing wall. He stretches his arm just far enough and grabs it. I reach up to the rope attached to him, pull down, and move my hand back to its original position in one smooth motion.
As I run the rope through my hands, I realize his life is literally in my hands. If he falls, it’s on me to catch him. The rope is the only thing keeping him from the ground and I am in control of it.
But this thought doesn’t spark any anxiety. Lots of things make me nervous, but this – as perilous as hanging 25 feet up may seem – wasn’t one of them.
Why I Will Never Make My Kids Sit on Santa’s Lap
No matter how much I want the photo, I’m never going to make my kids sit on Santa’s lap.
“My kids are notorious for not wanting to take pictures with Santa,” I commented to the person waiting at the mall kiosk. She had just pointed out that we could have made reservations to see Santa instead of waiting in line. But there was no way I was having my mother-in-law pay $40 ahead of time for my two sons to then refuse to be in the picture.
I wasn’t exaggerating. The only photos we had of our kids with Santa were from when they were too young to care. They’re each less than a year old in their respective photos. But once they hit two? Nope, nada, absolutely not. They wouldn’t even go near him. At Sesame Place’s Christmas celebration, my then four-year-old wanted a photo with Elmo, but he was only posing with Santa. So my son planted himself solidly on the other side of Elmo, as far away from the big guy as possible.
But did I try to force them to do it anyway? Nope. I never tried to force them to sit on Santa’s lap. It’s for similar reasons I’ll never make them hug or kiss a relative – or anyone, really.
The One Thing You Should Never Do Before Airport Security
PSA: If you are flying with your kids, do not use hand sanitizer or baby wipes before security. Seriously.
How do I know?
Guest Post on Romper: I Went Into Labor During A Job Interview, & Lived To Tell The Tale
Whenever someone asks about the birth story of my younger son, I usually start with, “Well, I was in an interview at NASA…” That start always gets them listening! I had the privilege of being able to share this story over at Romper with my article “I Went into Labor During a Job Interview and Lived to Tell the Tale.”
Here’s the first paragraph:
“I may be having pre-labor pains,” I said, trying to smile at the NASA employee about to interview me. “So if you see me making some funny faces, that’s why.” He paused for a split second. Then he nodded and chuckled like “ha ha, NBD.” NASA deals with landing robots on planets millions of miles away, so I guess a woman possibly in labor figures low on the excitement scale. As he passed through the security gate, I followed him, waddling along. Going on a job interview while pregnant isn’t anyone’s dream situation to begin with, but neither of us quite anticipated what we were in for.
Read the rest – including why I screamed at my husband for making a sandwich – over at Romper.
Note: this article went up a full year ago and I forgot to share it then. There will be several more like this in the next few weeks as I update my page.