Raffi

Songs To Grow On: Tear-Inducing Edition

/ Shannon Brescher Shea / 2 Comments

I was never a big crier – until I got pregnant. While I hardly ever cried at movies or books before, these days it seems like everything inspires tears. My first inkling of this affliction came during last year’s Super Bowl, when I cried over the Budwiser commercial with the horse and his friend. I blamed it on pregnancy hormones then, but I cried at their follow-up commercial this year as well. It must have been emotional imbalance brought on by sleep deprivation, right? Because I don’t want to be the type of person who cries during commercials.

Since then, music has had quite an impact on me, with a number of songs evoking very strong emotions. Not surprisingly, all of these songs are about children or family.

Songs that now make me cry:

Barenaked Ladies, When You Dream: This was the song that kicked it off. I love this album and probably had listened to this song 50 times before. But hearing it towards the end of my pregnancy, I realized for the first time how it encompassed all of the wonder and mystery of this little person who was going to be with us soon. From the ethereal music to the slightly surreal lyrics, it’s the perfect description of watching your newborn sleep peacefully. Eddie From Ohio’s on the same subject is very good too, but not as tear-inducing.

Raffi, I Wonder If I’m Growing: This was the first post-baby song that made me cry. While When You Dream illustrated the emotional difference between having a child or not, this song demonstrated the vast gap between children and their parents. The song is in first person, from the perspective of a little boy. He complains that he can’t tell if he’s getting bigger, but his mom reassures him that he is. He says he doesn’t know if he’s growing until he can reach the sink by himself one day and declares, “I must be growing!” At the time, thinking about my little baby being able to reach the sink by himself seemed in the same realm of imagination as sending him off to college – so far away, with so much fear and hope before then. With Sprout almost walking but frustrated by his limitations, I understand the mother’s perspective better now, watching your baby grow up quickly while they claim everything is going so slowly. Yes, honey, you are in fact growing.

Ben Folds, Still Fighting It: I don’t know if this song has triggered a full-on crying jag, but it definitely makes me sniffle. While the Barenaked Ladies’ song is all about the awe of being a parent, this perfectly summarizes the fear and neurosis. While I was pregnant, I was terrified that I wasn’t going to be a good enough mother. Even now, despite Chris’s encouragement, I still feel like I’m not meeting my own expectations, not happy enough or patient enough or anything enough. This song reminds me that I’m far from the only parent who feels this way. It also captures the inevitable level of at least occasional ennui of adulthood. “You’re so much like me, I’m sorry … I can tell you about today / how I picked you up and everything changed / It was pain, sunny days and rain / And me still feeling the same things.”

Frances England, You and Me: This simple little ditty took me by surprise when I heard it on Pandora’s kids station. It’s another one about watching a kid grow up fast, but from the parent’s perspective. The clear affection for the child and joy of spending time with her shines through. It also encompasses my complete bafflement as I watch Sprout grow. “How did you get so big overnight? / How did you get so smart and bright? / Yesterday you were asleep in my arms / Today, you’re growing off the charts.”

Sesame Street, I Don’t Want to Live on the Moon: Ernie sings this song, which works well because I think he’s the most emotionally earnest of all of the Sesame Street characters. It’s about how he would love to visit many wonderful places – the moon, under the ocean – but he wouldn’t want to live in any of them because he would miss his family. As someone who has traveled and lived abroad, I definitely relate. In addition, since having Sprout, I’ve come to appreciate my family – especially my parents and in-laws – and feel the geographic distance more than ever. I’ve also grown to value our local support system even more. As Ernie’s family is his friends on Sesame Street, it’s particularly poignant.

While crying at the drop of a hat is vaguely embarrassing, it also shows how parenting has made me more open-hearted. I’m willing to put up with a few tears for a greater ability to love.

Songs to Grow On: A Children’s Music Primer

/ Shannon Brescher Shea / 1 Comment

Songs to Grow On will be semi-regular feature on the blog, talking about children’s music, music not for kids but related to childhood, and random reminiscing from me on songs that were important to me as a kid.

Children’s music is a much-maligned genre. Some of it for good reason – Barney’s “I love you” song is intolerable in even the smallest of doses. I haven’t heard a single song by The Fresh Beat Band, but its name alone makes me shudder. Some of it is out of exhaustion born of repetition – even Love Reign O’er Me by The Who would be tedious the 30th time in a row. But despite its reputation, there’s some fairly good children’s music (and music appropriate for children) out there if you know where to look.

The Old-School Classics: Sometimes, it’s best to go back to the basics, as many of the musicians who follow are but poor imitations. Obviously, nursery rhymes were the first form of children’s music to exist. In addition to the music, a lot of nursery rhymes have accompanying hand motions, which are great for developing kids’ visual tracking and motor skills. If you don’t happen to remember the lyrics on your own, you can actually find whole albums of them. I particularly like the Mainly Mother Goose album by Sharon, Lois and Brahm, who actually put on the very first concert I ever attended.

While nursery rhymes have probably been around as long as nurseries, one of the first artists to popularize children’s music as a specific genre was Raffi. And his music is just as great as you remember it, especially if you like folk. He has fun riffs on classic songs and charming original material. We have The Singable Songs Collection, which is a great overview.

The Non-Children’s Musicians Making Children’s Music: Not all children’s music is made by people who cater only to the little ones. Some of the best stuff is done by artists who largely write for adults. In particular, art-rock geek favorite They Might Be Giants has a bunch of kids’ albums. We have Here Comes Science, with its hilarious songs about evolution and astronomy, but I’ve heard their others are good too. The Barenaked Ladies’ Snacktime album isn’t as educational, but it is quite entertaining. Of particular note is the title song, where they manage to cram in guest spots from a shocking number of famous folks including Rush’s Geddy Lee, Sarah McLachlan, and Weird Al. And this isn’t a new trend. Both Pete Seeger (who has recently been wonderfully honored in so many places) and Woody Guthrie put out albums of original material specifically for children. (Respectively, Birds, Beasts and Bigger Fishes and Songs to Grow On for Mother and Child.) In addition, some artists have one-off kids songs, like on this collection, although I can’t speak for its quality.

Non-Children’s Music that is Appropriate for Children: There’s a ton of music that wasn’t written for children, but nonetheless appeals to them. Obviously, it’s important that the lyrics are appropriate – I think most people would prefer not to inadvertently teach swears to their three-year-old or bring up adult subjects before you are ready to talk about them – but it’s good if the music is kid-friendly too. The best bet for fairly simple, melodic songs is going to older rock or folk-rock. In particular, The Beatles have a lot of lovely songs in this category, whether fun ones like Yellow Submarine or lullaby-like ones like Blackbird. A number of other artists have individual songs that reflect on childhood but are still appropriate for kids as well on otherwise adult albums, such as James Taylor’s Sweet Baby James, Billy Joel’s Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel), and Loggins and Messina’s House on Pooh Corner. (There are a couple of lullaby-like songs from other artists that are best avoided unless you’re prepared for some tough conversations like Harry Chapin’s Cats in the Cradle and James’ Lullaby!)

Movie and TV soundtracks: There are a lot of movies and TV shows with great songs, especially from the classic era of Disney musicals. Sprout doesn’t watch any TV right now, but in most cases you don’t need to have seen the movie to enjoy the songs. Other good possibilities include anything from The Jim Hensen Company (the Muppets, Fraggle Rock, Sesame Street) and kid-friendly musicals (Wizard of Oz, Sound of Music).

The “Radio”: Pandora sometimes comes up with some good options that I’ve never heard of. We usually use the Raffi station to start with. Unfortunately, commercials interrupt the music unless you subscribe.

While these are my favorite types, I know there are others some parents enjoy. For example, I think Led Zepplin done as lullabies is weird and vaguely distresses my musical sensibilities, but to each his or her own. Pregnant Chicken and Rants from Mommyland also have some fun lists.

What is your favorite music to play for kids?