Going for a hike on a brisk day, I asked my then four-year-old if he wanted his sweatshirt. “No!” he insisted. Nonetheless, I was going to be the responsible mom and bring it along anyway. Just in case.
Arriving at the hiking trail, he climbed out of his car seat and declared, “I’m coooold! So cold!”
Going to look for the sweatshirt, my smile dropped off my face. Nope, not there. Not there either. Crap, I forgot it.
“Want my sweater?” I offered. Being willing to shiver a bit is all part of being a mom. “Okay,” he acquiesced.
As I put it on him, I chuckled a bit. It’s an oversized sweater for an adult woman. He was absolutely swimming in it.
But to him, it was glorious. He swung the uber-long sleeves around with abandon. He tramped along the trail in his dress-length sweater, giggling all the way.
Meanwhile, I was vaguely embarrassed. He looked ridiculous. Every time we passed someone else on the trail, I stumblingly explained why he was in such an absurd piece of clothing.
But after a while, I realized that I was the one being ridiculous. He was warm, comfortable and happy – what else mattered?
His willingness to do whatever he darn well pleased reminded me of some core truths:
– Value physical comfort
– Wear what you want if it meets your needs
– Be willing to be totally silly
– Don’t give a damn about what anyone else thinks!
Since this originally happened (almost a full year ago), I like to think some of those lessons have sunk in a bit more for me. And judging his recent dancing in restaurants escapades and how comfortable he was in kindergarten, I think he still remembers them himself too.
For more on letting go of unhealthy expectations of your kids, check out Learning to Love My Son Exactly Where He is Standing.
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